February 3, 2025
"I'm so busy!" -everyone, sometimes
I'm sure you've heard it a million times. People all over the place are out here complaining about how busy they are. "Oh, I couldn't do all that. I'm just too busy," they'll say. And maybe they're right. Maybe they are too busy to do that thing. However, I wonder how often someone is too busy to do something they're actually just don't want to prioritize that thing. Further, I wonder how many people are actually busy, as opposed to just feeling like they're too busy.
Busy can mean different things to different people. The traditional term might mean something like "I've got a lot to do." However, I think there's another interpretation that's more accurate these days (or maybe all days): "I'm mentally overwhelmed/drained by what I need to do." Basically, I think people can often feel busier than they actually are. If something is very stressful, it can be mentally taxing, even if it doesn't take up a whole lot of actual time. Coordinating and planning things with people are great examples of this. Most of the time spent coordinating with friends seems to just be waiting for people to respond or provide input. But it's like a busy thread on a computer. You're stuck waiting on them, so you feel like you don't have room to do other stuff. It's taking up mental energy.
I think mental energy is the root of most busyness. You only have so much stuff you can stack up in your brain before it decides it's full. If you're working 40 stressful hours a day, for example, and you're thinking about work even when you aren't at work, you might consider yourself busier than if you were working 45-50 hours, but when you clock out, you're completely out. Work's taking up less space in your brain when you aren't working
You don't have time, huh?
There's 24 hours in a given day. Let's give 9 of those for sleep. Then, another 8 are allotted to working. And, for good measure, we'll throw in another hour for commuting. That gives us 6 hours left in the day for the rest of the shit we need to do. Cooking may take up another hour or so. Chores may take up another hour, on average, we'll say. 4 hours left now. Some people have families that take up more of their time, too, but we'll focus on those who are single or partnered with no children.
So, what do you do with your 4 hours? If you're most people, not much. If you're 25 to 34 years old, most of that time goes into "leisure activities," such as playing games or watching TV. Don't get me wrong, everyone needs some leisure time. And some days you might not be able to do pretty much anything if you've got no energy. I think that's normal. But there are 365 days in a year, each with 4 hours for you to do whatever you want. You probably have time.
I haven't even gotten to the weekends yet. With weekends, you can subtract the time spent at work, leaving you with a full 12 hours. That's a lot of time to do stuff. Even if you feel like you don't have time to exercise weekdays, do you have an excuse not to go on the weekends? Two days a week is better than zero, after all. I've heard the argument that people need weekends to "recharge". But is that true? I think it probably is, because work is very draining for a lot of people, after all. But I don't think you need to do mindless activities like watching YouTube or scrolling social media to recharge.
The reality is, mental energy is more complex than just "if you spend time working on things (mental or physical) it will drain you. Leisure time will restore your energy." Humans aren't batteries. Mental energy doesn't work like that. Sure, work can be draining. But, some work can also be restorative. If you're working on something you truly care about and you get the opportunity to enter a flow state, you may find yourself with more energy when you're finished for the day. Granted, you can often only work on something for so long before you're not producing things well, but you probably won't feel so drained.
I think most people just don't do things that give them energy. They spend most of their time working on things they don't care about, or watching things that barely restore their energy at all. I think you really need something in your life that will give you energy. For some people, it's close connections with friends. For others, it's a personal project they care a lot about. There's really no one thing that works for everyone. You kinda just have to go out and try doing stuff you really care about. Unfortunately, that can be really challenging. But it's worth it.
Okay, let's say all that shit from earlier in the post doesn't work for you because you really just are that fucking busy. Like, 8 hours of work a day? Yeah right, more like 12 hours a day. No time for anything anymore! Well, maybe that's true, I guess. But you've still got the weekends to do stuff. More importantly, however, busyness can be a choice, even if it doesn't feel like it. If your job is taking up all your time and mental energy and you really hate that, you can quit or find a new job. Or, you can even just do less work and not get that promotion or raise. You've got options. It won't necessarily be easy, but do you really want to be eternally busy? Do you want to always be drained? I guess I'll let you decide.
This post turned out kinda long and rambley, but I still think it's got a point in there somewhere. Pretty much, most people have more time than they think they do, they just don't use it very well. And, most people who feel like they have no time are actually just unfulfilled and/or stressed. Oh, also, if you're actually just really fucking busy, take some to figure out exactly why if you don't know why, and take steps to become less busy.